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deadjosey:

sickledsnake:

itsdorkgirl:

gravemakers-and-gunslingers:

BOND is a tiny touch module. It can be a pendant or a bracelet but it comes in pairs. You keep one and you give one to a friend. When you touch it, your friend feels it. No matter where they are on the planet. We don’t do tweets, we do tickles.

we need this

gonna put it on my dick

THAT IS NOT THE INTENDED USE SIR

If I had a dick I would put it on my dick

(Source: ldrsociety)

fauxmosexualtranstrender:

ofcrosseddaggers:

sing-thebodyelectric:

today a customer asked me for a “medium whatever” and then got frustrated with me when i asked him what he meant

this is it 

this is the post that 100% accurately describes working with the public

"can i get a medium?"

"a medium what?"

"YOU FUCKING RUDE LAZY OBNOXIOUS PEOPLE GET ME YOUR MANAGER GET ME THE CORPORATE NUMBER GIVE ME A REFUND I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU SCUM THINK YOU DESERVE A LIVING WAGE"

theweaponofchoice:

what’s even cornier are those posts like ADULTS FORCE YOU TO GO TO COLLEGE AND CHOOSE A CAREER FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE I JUST WANT TO TRAVEL THE WORLD, EXPERIENCE LIFE, AND BE IN THE WILD

boo hoo your parents are paying for you to go to college how do you think you’re going to travel the world when all you do now is watch reruns of Daria and make text posts about how you’re too scared to use a telephone to order delivery pizza

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